It would be very easy for me to look at you, with my hands on my hips and say, "Just who do you think you are?" I will not do that, however. I get the feeling that you get that sort of reaction a lot, and all that really does, is pour more fuel onto the fire. No, what I want to do, is sit down with you, give you a hug, and have an honest conversation.

To be brutally honest with you, it is said that people like you are generally not happy. Something is going with you, in order for you to feel that you have to be mean to others. Something is going on at home, or in your personal life where there is a lot of inner turmoil. You don't have the positive skills needed in order to resolve conflicts appropriately. You are angry, or depressed, and rather than to admit those things about yourself, you turn the turmoil onto other people. You are avoiding your own problems, and that makes you feel better about yourself. If others are focused on the victim of your bullying, then they are certainly not focused on you. That is extremely sad.

Do you have any idea what you are doing, and the consequences of your actions? You don't see what happens to the girl or boy you just teased or made fun of once they go home. You don't see that they cry themselves to sleep and beg their parents to let them stay home from school the next day. You don't realize that the issues you are focusing on in your bullying, are issues that they deal with everyday.

For example...You just teased the girl who is overweight, and stated to someone else that she should probably eat a salad. What you don't know about her, is that she has a medical problem, and cannot lose the weight so easily. She struggles everday with this. Once you teased her, she goes home and she refuses to eat her supper, which in turn makes her very unhealthy. She's hungry, but she's terrified to put anything in her mouth because it might make her gain more weight. I bet you didn't know that.

The boy you just made fun of because he wears dirty clothes to school, just went home and begged his parents to teach him how to use the washing machine. What you may not know, is that his parents work long hours and don't always have the time to wash his clothes. Maybe his clothes aren't designer clothes. You think that's funny because your parents spend a lot of money to make you look good. What you may not know, is that his father just got laid off, and they struggle to pay the bills and provide the essentials for the family. I bet you didn't know that.

I bet you didn't know that the boy you just shoved into the locker just because he's not in your circle of friends, goes home and has to explain the bruises on his back. He lies to his parents and tells them that he got hurt in gym class playing dodge ball. He is ashamed to tell his parents that you have been abusing him, because his parents have always taught him to stand up for himself. He's scared though. Everytime you approach him, he gets knots his stomach and he practically get sick.

If those examples weren't bad enough, you then had to pick on the student who is gay. You made fun of him because he was honest about his feelings and decided that he didn't want to hide who he really is anymore. You yelled out hateful things to him because you don't understand his way of life. So? Why should his sexual preference (or anyone's sexual preference for that matter) be of any concern of yours? What you don't know, is that he did not choose to be gay, or bisexual, or transgendered. The young lady who is a lesbian didn't choose that for herself, either. Why would they choose a way of life where the community and other groups make fun of them? Why would they choose a way of life where they do not receive equal rights that the rest of us take for granted? Does that even make sense?

We live in a world where diversity is encouraged (or should be encouraged, I should say). It doesn't matter if we are black or white, asian or hispanic, gay or straight. We are PEOPLE first. It also shouldn't matter that some people have a learning disability, a neurological disorder, or have a mental disorder. We do not choose to have those things. We are people first, who happen to be a little bit different. I have depression, Mr. Bully. It's not who I am, but what I have. Does that make me any less of a person than you are? No. I happen to think I am a unique individual, and if you took the time to know me, you might just like me.

Do you know what happens to these victims of yours once you go home and laugh that you've had a good day? They sometimes end up committing suicide. Is it funny now? Is it funny that you have hurt someone so deeply, that rather than to confront you about it, they go home and kill themselves? If they don't kill themselves, they are extremely depressed. They don't want to go to school. They don't want to be involved in any extra curricular activities, and sometimes they act out at home. Their parents don't understand what is going on with them, so out of desperation to gain control back in their own household, they punish them until their behavior improves. Is that funny?

No...I bet if you were to think about it, you wouldn't find any of this funny at all. I bet if you took the time to get to know these classmates of yours, you would most likely be friends with them. The problem is, you don't think very highly of yourself, so you choose not to make those steps.

I am sorry that things are not going well for you. I'm sorry that your grades are poor, so you are making up for your embarassment by taking the focus off of yourself. I'm sorry that your parents don't listen to you, or spend enough time with you. I'm sorry that your older brother bullied you at one point, so you think it's perfectly natural to bully others.

I want to reach out to you. I want your parents and the community to reach out to you. I want to teach you the appropriate social skills that you need, and I want you to attend anger management classes. I want you to learn positive coping skills for when you are angry, and I want you to like yourself. You are actually a good kid. You just make poor choices.

It's not too late, you know. You CAN turn this all around, and you can make ammeds for what you have done. All you have to do is make that first step.

I know you can do it. I have faith in you, and I am right here to help you when you are ready.